Sadness and Joy

Love Your Emotions and Understand the Meaning They Offer

Brene Brown said it perfectly when she said “The darkness does not destroy our light. The darkness defines it.”. Often times, parents who raise children with special needs, find that their emotional core is all over the place. Love your emotions and understand the meaning they offer. When you can embrace that emotion, it all goes back to love. You’ll find ease on your journey as a mother who has a child, or children with special needs.

As mothers, we have a fierce desire to protect our children. While we are pregnant, we hope our child will have all of their limbs, their daddy’s eyes and mom’s smile. We also hope they will stay in our tummy until it’s time to be born, and there will be no complications of the delivery. We pick out the colors of the nursery, and get the room clean and pretty for rocking the baby to sleep.

We don’t, however, anticipate birth defects, birth injuries, umbilical cord strangulation and other birth issues that can happen to babies within moments of their first breath. Even with technology to the point of detailed sonograms so clear you can see your whole baby, weeks after gestation, there are still many medical issues that can arise.

As a mother, you don’t know how to react to the news that your child has cerebral palsy, and you may not have had any warning of the autism spectrum. These are conditions among children that require super moms to step up. And with this requirement comes a boatload of emotions.

At first, you may feel angry. How could this happen to my baby? Didn’t I eat the right food? Didn’t I take the right supplements? I even sang to my baby. Why is this happening?

Do these self-defeating statements ring true to you? For many moms, dealing with the emotions of being a mother to a child with special needs, creates many emotions. These emotions all go back to deep, intense love. Even emotions such as guilt and shame can connect with the emotion of love, through action and connection. Love, although many people think is an emotion, is actually an engrained chemistry that is default in the human soul.

Anytime you are feeling defeated as a mom who has devoted her life to ensure her child has a happy experience, remember that you love (an action) and you are love (a noun). Repeat this mantra “Although I feel Sadness – I am Love”.

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